Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

I've put a lot of stock into turning 25. I have dubbed it my 'Get My Shit Together Year.' My birthday is in a little over three weeks, and as that date approaches, I'm noticing some significant changes in myself. I'm a lot less confused about where I stand on different issues and what my opinion is, and much more inclined to be firm about where I am and be okay with that. I believe that we can set up self-fulfilling prophecies and wonder if that's what has been going on, or if it's the natural progression of who I've been for the past year or so.
I've heard many who've conquered the Quarter Life landmark say that things change after 25. We stop growing physically, we can rent cars, and ultimately there's a new perspective about life. 24 has come with its own challenges, all rewarding, but I feel like 25 is going to be a magic year, and not just because I can fly places and rent cars in airports if I so choose (and if I so have the finances for such a thing). Things are falling into place internally and now, more than ever, I have a much more firm grasp on my identity and all that the idea encompasses.

I have also put a lot of work into myself over the past year. The Fall of 2011, I embarked on a self-love journey that took me places I never thought I'd go with myself. I was finally happy in my skin and delighted to see myself in the mirror every day. It also made me realize that while I was working on a lot of the surface stuff, the stuff that was easy to grab and alter in my mind, I was also getting closer to a lot of scary truths buried underneath what I had started to change. Though I wake up happy more often than not, there are days where my insecurities come out in full force. I am working on NOT feeling guilty for still having insecurities, or the reality that there may always be something weak in my defenses. I am also learning how to lower some of those defenses.

I've learned a lot about myself in the past year, from how to manage my anxiety (stop fighting it) and how I approach relationships (a lot more guarded than you'd suspect). I've learned that I have to forgive myself for things I am ashamed of and not be afraid to let people go. So, 25 looks to be a pretty bang-up year, and I am delighted in all that I will learn over the next year. I look forward to new goals, new friends, new perspectives on old relationships, and maybe some reconnections. I look forward to growth and challenge and learning to be WITH my pain and struggle rather than work AGAINST it.

I'm grateful for a lot, even if everything I got didn't always come in packages I wanted or found appealing. I'm grateful for people who are here and who weren't here, for a boyfriend who gives me the space and freedom to explore who I am and grow in myself just as I grow in our relationship and who endeavors to do the same for himself. Though I'm still unpackaging some things that aren't easy to face, I'm grateful for the strength I have in doing so.

For anyone who has been over the 25 hump: did you have the same change in perspective? Is it such a magical year? For anyone who has yet to reach 25: what do you think will happen when you reach that age and am I making it to be something more or less than what it is?

Here's to 25: Another year of me being fucking awesome :)

In three weeks and three days anyway!