On Respect and Religion

Religion is something that is very important to many people. I value it because it affords psychological needs to those who otherwise might not have anything. Yet, it is not the only way those same needs, safety or belongingness, are met, nor is it something devoid of problems and impervious to criticism.

A lot of people connect their religious beliefs very strongly to themselves, much like the way I consider my sexual orientation, race, and gender as a part of myself. The main distinction here is that religious beliefs are not so essential to life as the three categories I mentioned. Quite the opposite: it reflects something social and generational in nature with no biological analogue (though some would presume this is to be debated). That’s why I very strongly advocate the idea that you should always respect believers, but you don’t have to respect their beliefs.

Religion is not something that is as closely tied to human existence as we presume. Still, it is something that many people hold dear. This reality is why I think a lot of people equate an attack or criticism on their beliefs to be a criticism on themselves. At first glance, this sounds a lot like homophobic or heterosexist comments or jokes about gay people. Using this platform, you’d logically assume that people are only attacking the ideas around non-heterosexual (or heterosexual) orientations rather than the orientation itself. Yet, because the thoughts, feelings, and emotions related to sexual orientation are a natural part of how we exist as humans, critiquing the idea does end up critiquing the population. They’re tied to personhood in important ways. Religious beliefs simply are not, but we often act as though they are.

This sounds a lot like ‘love the sinner, hate the sin,’ but it’s not the same. For one, in the case of homosexuality, that says it’s okay to hate what people do and how they live their lives just as long as you don’t hate them. Again, because sexual orientation and the behaviors that go along with it are part of something natural for humans, any negative remarks do end up hitting those who adopt those identities. In this case, not all people who are atheist or agnostic hate religion. I don’t, but it sure as hell has its problems and I think those problems need to be talked about, especially in nations like America where religious beliefs and convictions are a large part of perpetuating discrimination and negatively impact people’s lives.

If critiquing or insulting religion means insulting those who believe it, then how are those beliefs to be questioned? How are we going to get anywhere if we have to essentially protect religion from verbal harm? Who gets to decide what’s harmful or what’s not? Calling Easter ‘Zombie Jesus Day’ may be insensitive and disrespectful, but: 1) religion doesn’t have to be respected, the believers do and 2) we’re setting up a system where we have to protect people’s sensibilities because their personal identity is so closely tied to an ideology. The same could be said for any equality movement, except often the sensibilities tied into the support for that movement involve people. So being ‘forced’ to be ‘PC’ so you don’t offend anyone in terms of gender is actually asking you to watch your language and behaviors toward people based on who they are in comparison to what they believe.

Protecting religion also doesn’t get at how atheist people may not want to be told ‘Happy Easter’ or ‘Merry Christmas.’ Aren’t those beliefs to be respected as well? If I am to go to Hell for not believing in God, how is that not offensive to me, especially when I live my life with high personal moral standards, endeavoring to be kind to all? There does seem to be a double standard, and a lot of it revolves around religion’s place in people’s lives for thousands of years. Just because it’s been here for a long time does not mean that we can’t say anything negative about it.

This gets into more gray area than I’ve mentioned, because this does seem to related to a lot of other ideas and ways of being. However, there is one important thing to mention: religion is a set of beliefs, not a person. It is an institution with power and influence that often, but not always, plays a role in perpetuating discrimination and inequality. Even a hostile critique on religion is not the same as a hostile critique on the people that believe in it. I believe it’s disrespectful to people to call them stupid for believing in a higher power, but it’s not disrespectful to question the tenets of the accompanying belief system.

My race, sexual orientation, ability, intelligence, gender, or any other thing related to me on a biological and innate level is to be respected because it is directly tied to my existence as a person and a human, and the same applies to each and every person.

My beliefs on the other hand, are fair game. They may be important to me, but I’d still be just as Black, gay, able-bodied, intelligent, and male without them.