There's only so much I can experience from behind closed doors. Lamplight and music bounce off the walls and that's about as much as I can experience. I can invite people in, I can open windows, metaphorically and literally. I can call, txt, send e-mails. I can interact with the outside world from behind a closed door.
What I cannot do is experience that world. I can reach it, but not touch it. I can hear words from inside but can't be spoken to by voices from the outside. Behind closed doors I become unreachable, unattainable, and everything I've built within four walls or more becomes all I can show for.
I've stayed here for so long that I don't know much else. Making this place my world has done its damage manifested in a slower paced social life and unwillingness to be around others or even communicate with others. Maybe this needs to change.
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