This Too Shall Pass

It's been a while... And it's weird how many posts begin with that statement.

Well, it didn't work out. I just hope it doesn't end up like last time...

I'm awake, can't fall asleep, can't cry.... I feel like I can't do much of anything. I know tomorrow and Saturday will be hard. People will ask "What happened?" or "Do you feel okay?" All those questions I don't want to hear and don't want to answer. I almost wish people knew about break-ups instinctively so you didn't have to divulge any details.

I guess it was a closing to another chapter in my life. I'm scared it's going to affect my grades and my work and applying for grad school. My thoughts are in a jumble now...

Just, it also feels like a new beginning. I can be single and have fun again. I can change the format of my blog, change the links, I don't know.

There is just one nagging feeling though... The feeling of failure. Now, I'm the roommate without a partner. I'm surrounded by people in long-term relationships (or, maybe those relationships are just more noticeable at this point). I wonder, what could I have done to prevent this? How long will this emptiness, heartache, or whatever you choose to call it last? When will I date again? When will HE date again? Can I still go to yoga?

I'm hoping this is goodnight, because I want to wake up and be productive. And flirt with the straight boy at work to make myself feel better.